"Show, don't tell" is perhaps the most common advice given to writers. But what does it actually mean, and how can you implement it in your writing? This article will explore the concept, providing practical examples and techniques to transform your writing from bland exposition to engaging, visceral prose.
Understanding "Show, Don't Tell"
At its core, "showing" means allowing your readers to experience the story through actions, words, thoughts, senses, and feelings rather than through the author's exposition and description. Instead of simply stating how a character feels or what a setting looks like, you create a vivid picture that allows readers to draw their own conclusions.
Examples of Telling vs. Showing
Telling: John was very angry.
Showing: John's face reddened as he clenched his fists. He slammed the book onto the table, causing his coffee mug to topple and spill across the manuscript he'd spent all night perfecting.
Telling: The old house was creepy and abandoned.
Showing: Paint peeled from the Victorian's weathered clapboards like dead skin. The porch stairs groaned under Sarah's weight, and through the broken window, tattered curtains swayed without a breeze.
When to Show and When to Tell
While "show, don't tell" is excellent advice, it doesn't mean you should never tell. In fact, sometimes telling is more appropriate:
- Use telling for transitions - "Three weeks passed before she heard from him again" is more efficient than showing every day of those three weeks.
- Use telling for less important information - Not every detail needs elaborate showing. Save your showing for emotional moments, character development, and critical scenes.
- Use telling to control pacing - Sometimes you need to move the story along quickly.
Techniques for Showing Effectively
1. Use Sensory Details
Engage all five senses to create immersive experiences:
Instead of "The beach was beautiful," try: "The salt spray kissed her cheeks as bare feet sank into warm sand. Gulls cried overhead, their bodies bright against the cerulean sky, while the rhythmic crash of waves drowned out all thoughts of the city she'd left behind."
2. Use Specific, Concrete Language
Replace abstract concepts with tangible details:
Instead of "The meal was delicious," try: "She closed her eyes as the dark chocolate ganache melted on her tongue, the hint of sea salt providing the perfect counterpoint to the rich sweetness."
3. Reveal Character Through Action and Dialogue
Let readers understand personality through what characters do and say:
Instead of "Mark was generous," try: "Mark counted out his last five dollars and slipped the bills into the homeless man's cup when he thought no one was looking."
4. Use Body Language and Microexpressions
Physical reactions often communicate emotions more powerfully than naming the emotions:
Instead of "She was nervous about the interview," try: "Her fingers drummed against her thigh as she sat in the waiting room. Every few seconds, she checked her watch, then smoothed down her already-smooth skirt. When the receptionist called her name, she stood so quickly she knocked over her purse, spilling its contents across the polished floor."
Exercises to Practice Showing
- Emotion Translation: Take a simple emotion statement (e.g., "He was sad") and rewrite it using only physical descriptions and actions.
- Scene Setting: Describe a location without using any adjectives, relying instead on concrete nouns and strong verbs.
- Character Revealer: Write a scene that reveals a character trait without ever naming the trait directly.
By mastering the art of showing rather than telling, you'll create more engaging prose that resonates with readers and brings your stories to life. Remember that it's about finding the right balance—knowing when to paint a detailed picture and when to simply state the facts and move on.
If you'd like personalized feedback on your showing vs. telling, consider reaching out for a sample edit of your manuscript. With my experience editing over 50 manuscripts across various genres, I can help identify opportunities to transform telling passages into showing ones that will captivate your readers.